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NuzzleCat

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wonder

3 min read
Whilst laying flat on a back of toasty warm wonder- impulse thrummed through me while each detail thundered.
Thoughts paled into the difference of contrast, of logic dancing with old vows, as I flowed a slow waltz with the figure eights of calm questioning of my past falls. If for no other reason than a straight balance line, to catch my flakier faults, I held my arms open to more massive thoughts...and I fell and fell into a deep warm wonder that was spiced with innocent curiosity and an abnormally strong composure.
I greeted my fears with such calm respect that for once it was their face that tiled with retrospect. The relation caused shame, which flew against me like a chill against thought, but I swung myself through so as if not to get caught up. I still have deep fears of my past, filled with impossible answers...But even alas, as what should have broke my being, I'm still much more than any action of another could lead me to being. I didn't question it as I never have because it has always been there when I'm sad...a whispery aura that could be thought as cold or as misleading or dreadfully old- nothing but a mirror of distinct infinite originality one to myself and a free flow to all.
My mind is a mirror maze and my heart a wolf's call but lost I'll never be for I have lived with it all. It isn't a grateful aspect to the environment around me but a respect for the soul of a very fulfilling being. In aspect you could say that I am my own god but to simplify means all a good brain is is a loosening thread to climb down from it all- to an almost purgatory sense where aches a dropped fear to fall. Love is a harness and the only other thing that is fit for the equal of simply full respect and I would give my all in a deep dream if it let my heart clasp meet with the deep soul of my brain...
& there lies the simplest truth of the good in human gain. If you saw like I did, and had seen what I've seen, the other side of things is the deepest ugliness and contradiction of means- it goes against the healthiness of a true faltered self to a deeper stronger hold to lack of acceptance and self-help. It's an ugly world but only because of our lack of being there for each other rather than acting so much as like manipulative thugs to ourselves and one another. I'm neither a pessimist or an optimist or a realist at all, sometimes you could say they all exist in my faults, for the healthiest being does not need to question they only need but dance with the flow of the ever-repeating, what we all deeply know if we give it all, seemingly to chance, to wonder.
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1. Let us not analyze how distant we'd gone... but how far we be.
2. Chances are the fascination- the fear is only fascination.
3. You/We/I/They  > are/am/always  > what/how/when/why  > We/I/You  > let/affect/effect(Commense to the beginning)
4ish.always moving forward & not at all, for sense of loss of description, by habitually& lackingly measuring.
5. Life= a shared self-evident, everything&truly nothing at all, whatever one may choose,chance, probability, visually lacking by limit of heart, feeling around in the dark, unison, planar, human=affected&effected= pivot=dark hearts&knowing foundation=self-evident=unmoving *because of* unseeing eye=completely upon act(physical)&totally unseen=feeling=driver of choice=you&me/us
                                               =All we know&choose to see&what we feel with every movement of our being.

~I love you&what we could do, we aren't so different but our distinct steering(uniqueness) could lead to something that is both of us & neither of us. We are life, I breathe with you as you with me. We are one. You are me& I you. 'Dance' with me & my sincerity will gladly take you. Be yourself as I will do my best when genuine with you. Step with me. Let us.
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